I'm a Rockstar!

After losing nothing yesterday, I woke to a 1.4 release this morning! Thank you, HCG Gods!

For this round I'm down 25. 4 pounds, so I've met the Rockstar Challenge to lose 25 pounds. I'm hoping to lose even more, but I might be cutting this round short.

For over two weeks now I've been dealing with hunger. The stomach growling kind of hunger. The great releases I've had have kept me from cheating, but it's made me miserable at times. So I tried upping my dosage from 150iu to 175iu but after four days and a brand new batch of hcg, the hunger was just as bad. So yesterday I dropped down to 125iu. I still have hunger, but I'm going to give it a few days before I monkey with the dosage again, give my body time to adjust.

The hunger is the reason I'm thinking of cutting this round short, although I'm loathe to end the weight release party I've been having. But starting Monday, September 13th I'm going to CNA school. It's a six week course, five days a week, and I just don't think I can do the first week or two if I have hunger. I'm 33 and it's been a looooong time since I went to school. Plus it's a subject I never saw myself studying, I was drawn to English and History. Math and Science and the thought of being a nurse or a nurse's assistant never once crossed my mind. But I enjoy my work as a home health care companion, so I'm willing to give it my all.

I think in order to give my brain the best chance at absorbing all the new info, I need to make sure it's fed properly. So if I can't get my hunger under control I'll start P3 on the 13th. But we shall see. I hate ending this round, but my classes will be from 9am to 2:30pm every day, and I really want to do well. Because the course is expensive and I can't afford not to put every effort towards it. And did I mention I'm super nervous? I know a lot of the stuff I do as a home health care companion are similar to CNA duties, but I'm just freaking out about going back to school. Because that's what I do. lol

Off to go shopping with the Hubs. I'm planning on hitting the Halloween store because the Halloween festivities start early in my home! Lots of love, encouragement and wishes for happy releases to all!

Highs and Lows

Still a loooong way to go, but I'm getting there!

I'm currently on VLCD 16 of R2P2 and I'm down a total of 22.6 pounds, which is awesome! But for over a week now I've had hunger. At first I attributed it to TOM, but he's been gone for several days now and if anything my hunger has gotten worse. So I'm upping my dosage. I currently inject 150iu every morning, but I'm going up to 175iu. I've held out as long as I can, but I'm worried my hunger will lead to a cheat.

And I don't want to cheat! Not this close to finally being in 240's.

In other news- I've blogged and vlogged about how I wish I'd paid more attention to my weight over the years. I purposely wouldn't write it down in any of the food diaries (how's that for striving for success?) instead I would just write down how much I was up or down. I don't know why I was so afraid to let people know my weight, but I was. Well, today I found yet another old food and exercise diary. Flipping through it I assumed I hadn't even bothered to use it, but I found exactly one week of 2008 filled out. And I'd actually put down my weight!

The reason I'm shocked is because it's a higher number than I ever remember being. I thought at one point I had been in my 300's, but wasn't sure. Well according to my food diary I was a whooping 317!

When I started the HCG Protocol in June of this year I was 291, and gained 3 pounds loading. So in 2 years time, on my own, I only managed to lose 26 pounds. A large part of that I'm sure is that I switched careers and was no longer eating out constantly. And I've been known to occasionally exercise, very occasionally. With the help of the protocol and my awesome Hubs and friends (Ame this means you!) I've already lost 43 pounds. Since June!

Shocked and awed? I am.

Happy releases, happy maintaining and happy loading to all depending on you phase!

30 Pounds Released!!

I started my HCG journey on June 6th of this year. My first round was a short one, only 23 days, but I lost a little over 23 pounds. I stabilized in P3 and only had to do a steak day once, and then I even lost a couple pounds in P4 despite my crazy 3 week beach vacation food eating habits. But today whilst plugging in my stats I realized that I've lost 30 pounds on HCG! If you can tell, I'm thrilled!

I still have over a 100 pounds to go, the journey is far from over. But I finally feel I'm getting somewhere! I've lost enough weight now that I can see and not just feel the results. I think by the time I'm done with this second round the physical results will be easy to see- at least I hope! Not that it matters, because I already feel like a brand new me!

I can't sing the praises of Hcg enough! I can't stop using exclamations! lol It's hard for me not to tell everyone in the world about this diet, but I'll wait until people start asking me how I'm losing (releasing!) the weight.

The thing to remember about the protocol is that even though it's hard at times the results are worth it as long as you stay true to Pounds & Inches. Yesterday was Day 3 of VLCD and I had some hunger but I avoided cheating and woke up this morning to a 2.6 loss! Do I think this diet is for everyone? No, it's not some miracle cure for fat loss. But I do think this protocol will have miraculous results for everyone that's ready to put in the work to release their fat!

Okay, I better end this blog before I end up sounding like a infomercial sell out. I have 300 some odd pages still left to read in The Passage for book club this evening. It's a great book, but very long! Happy releasing to all of you!

Here We Go Again! Round 2, baby!

This is pretty much how my loading days went!

Despite the fact that I feel like hurling after my 2 day food fest, otherwise known as loading days, I'm excited to start my first VLCD of Round 2. Actually, I'm mostly excited that I don't have to force another morsel into my overstuffed body. I was stuffing in food until 1am this morning, and I have the acid reflux and overall bloated feeling to prove it.

I loaded well, I really did. I ate almost constantly and mostly stuck to fats (although I love me some carbs and starches so they had to come to the party too). I was a bit weirded out to have only gained .6 after the first day but I realize that it was probably because my body had stabilized so well. When I kept gorging the second day my body realized that it was time to pack on the pounds. Overall I'm up 4 pounds, which is good. I know, it's strange to be happy about a gain, but I'm hoping it means I feel better this round than last round.

So what did I eat? I ate pork rinds, cheese, macadamia nuts, ice cream- lots of ice cream, loaded potato skins, a slice of unbelievably good white chocolate cheese cake from TGIF, maple bacon, mini quiches- a lot of them, burger and hotdog and fries from Five Guys, and some cheese cracker thingys from Pepperidge Farms. I ate a lot. I gorged. I feel like crap, but some of it was actually fun to eat- some of it felt like a chore to chow down on. Other than the ice cream and cheesecake I stayed away from sugars, and I've kept my self imposed ban on soda. I still miss Coke from time to time, but it's more like the way I occasionally wonder what old friends are up to - you know, the ones I can't track down on Facebook.

For those of you not friends of mine on Facebook, my HCG account name is Kathleen Hcg. The reason I mention this is because I've mentioned that I've joined a Facebook Hcg Challenge. Truth is, I've joined two. BaldFatMan Hcgfixesthat started a group to get a bunch of people doing a round at the same time, and then there's the 25 Pound Rockstar Challenge hosted by three lovely hcg ladies. Mostly I'm doing the Rockstar challenge because most people doing that loaded this weekend. Normally weekends suck for me since I work so much on Saturdays, but I was still on vacation this weekend so other than a few hours last night, I didn't have to work at all. Now if you're close to starting a round, there's still time to join either or both groups- there are some people starting a week late in Rockstars and I know there's several Labor Day Weekend loaders out there as well.

The more support you have in your Hcg journey the better chance of your success. I know I am blessed to have a wonderfully supportive (and super sexy) husband to help me out. I have great friends like Ame, who is my Hcg hero, and now our friend Courtney to cheer me on. Ame has worn down Courtney's resistance and the two of them will be starting a round in November. I could not be happier! It'll be awesome when our Terrific Trio are all thin together! And now I get to start my Round 2 with lots of Facebook friends releasing along with me. And even those not currently doing P2 are cheering us along. I had such a good first round that I admit, round 2 has me a little nervous. 23 days seemed to go pretty quickly, 40 days (actually 46 with the skip days counted) might not fly by so fast. But I'm hoping to be in my 240's by the end of it! Okay, actually I'm secretly hoping to be 239 at the end, but let's keep that a secret.

If you're not already my friend on Facebook feel free to add me! If you're on the Hcg journey but don't have an Hcg facebook account then you need to start one! You don't have to have a separate account, but a lot of us prefer to keep our Hcg family separate from our non-Hcg family. It's all about finding support and people who are going through the process with us. I love my Hcg family. Now off to drink some black coffee- oh, milk, I will miss you most of all- and my morning dose of Hcg!

HCG and Vacation

Sorry, long time no post but not a whole lot going on HCG wise. I did my 3 weeks of P3 pretty successfully, only had to do one steak day when I went .2 over my 2 pound limit. It went much easier than I had planned and I've had no problems adding starches and sugars to my diet.

Well, correction, I've had almost no problems. Alcohol seems to lead to weight gain, but now that I'm in extended P3, or P4 if you want to call it that, I've actually been losing. Despite being on vacation! I'm in the middle of my 3 week beach vacation. I've been eating all sorts of my favorite foods- pizza, burgers and wonderful french fries! There have been some changes though- I'm careful with my calorie intake and I'm still drinking tons of water. I've kept up my ban on soda, because I refuse to waste calories on drinks.

Being at the beach has had some unforeseen advantages- I do a lot of walking because there's lots of places close by, and sometimes just for fun. Hanging out in the ocean all day, dodging waves and swimming have definitely helped with any of the carbs I've ingested the past week and a half.

I don't know if I'm "cured" of my food addictions- I still think of food, but nowhere near as much as I did pre-HCG. I really think upping my water intake has helped a lot. I realize now that I just wasn't getting enough water in P2. I was only drinking between 2-3 liters, 4 only on a really, really good day. But I'm a bigger girl, and I should be drinking half my body weight in ounces. So now I drink at least 4 liters a day, although I try to aim for 6. I really think this has made a huge impact on my appetite. My LDW was 271.4 and I've been in the high 260's for several days now. Seeing that scale in the 260's really perked me up!

I'll be starting my second round of HCG Aug 15th. I'm doing that BaldFatMan Challenge, mostly because I love the idea of really doing phase 2 with other people. The challenge will help keep me motivated and help keep me honest and cheat free. I only did a 23 day round last time, and I'm aiming for 40 days this time so I need all the encouragement and support I can get! I didn't cheat once last round, but the 23 days seemed to go by pretty quickly. Not so sure those 40 some days will fly by (especially since I'll be skipping a dose per week so it's more like 47 days *shiver*). But I can do this!

Right?

RIGHT!

I also planning on doing more vlogging and blogging. And I'm gonna eat a lot more chicken! I ate a lot more beef then I had originally planned to eat last time, and I used cottage cheese as a crutch anytime I was too lazy to prepare. I am so ready to be below 250, and then below 200... that still seems like a dream, but I no longer think it's an unattainable goal. It's totally attainable! Next summer at the beach is going to rock!

What do you love about HCG?

You know what I really love about the HCG protocol? It's not the obvious weight loss, or the way it's reshaping my body.... Okay, I love it for those reasons too. But at the moment, a week into P3, that I love how this diet has made me feel about food! I swear, before I started HCG, I thought about food all the time. I planned, I dreamed, I schemed. What was I going to eat next? It was a sick obsession.

It didn't happen right away. The first couple of weeks on P2 I still thought about food- but mostly what I was going to eat on my next loading days. I was worried about P3, if I'd be able to stay away from the carbs and sugars that have so often been my go to foods. But something happened that changed me. I started really seeing the results on the scale. My clothes started fitting better. I haven't lost a lot of weight yet, but I've loss enough to realize that I don't want to ever gain it back.

The hold food had on me is loosening. Oh, I still really want fries and other food baddies, but I don't think about it constantly like I used to. I read a book recently about this woman who lost 200 pounds in two years doing the Weight Watchers diet. In the opening of the book she talked about how every day revolved around what food she wanted to eat- including vacations and family nights. About how she would order so much food from a drive thru that she always ordered a second drink to make it appear as if she were buying for two people instead of just herself. I'm ashamed to admit that I've done that too. I let food become my driving force, my reason some days for just leaving the house.

In a way food became both my prison and my biggest comfort.

My weight loss journey is still in it's baby steps. But I'm no longer willing to put food before myself , my family, or my friends. I want to be able to go out in the world and not feel like everyone's staring at my fat ass. I know it'll take a long time before I feel confident, before I feel like I look "normal". What makes this time different is that I have HCG in my life. It's helping me to be honest about my awful past food habits, and it's reshaping the way I think about what foods I put into my body. I never thought that would happen.

I confess, part of me was scared to go on the protocol. Part of me wasn't ready to give up the foods I so love and loathe. I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to stick to the protocol. I have spent most of my life poisoning myself willingly and on some level I have always known that. It wasn't enough to get me to stop. But HCG is enough, and the results I've had so far is enough, and finally my life is worth enough to stop. I can't believe that I care so little about the taste of food when it used to mean so much!

Thank you HCG, thank you Ame, thank you HCG community, thank you Aaron. Thank you God. I feel a real change happening in my life, and I am so very grateful. I know with all of you out there cheering me on I can continue moving forward. And even if your voices quieted, I know that I have enough willpower to carry me to the finish line.

Sunburn and Scale Gods

I've been lucky to be steadily losing, but the past few days I was stuck at 275 point something. I know it was TOM, but boy was it frustrating! Yesterday the Hubs and I went swimming, because it's been unholy hot here in VA, and of course I got a sunburn. And sunburns being sunburns, I didn't know right away, but ended up taking a long nap yesterday. Woke up in the evening, noticed the burn and started worrying. The Hubs was quick to point that sunburns can make you retain water. My goal of hitting 274 seemed out of reach.

But the scale gods were kind this morning and I woke to a pound loss! I only have a few more days to get to 269, not sure I can do it, but I'm hopeful. TOM appears to be leaving the party, so I'm hoping the fat will leave with him. I only have a few more days of injections and then onto p3! Next round I'll go for the 43 days, but I know I'm making the right decision. It would be too hard to be on a strict diet during my entire 3 week vacation, and I'm not quite ready to share my diet with my family. It's going to take another round at least before my losses are dramatic enough to really show. But I'm going to get there. I still can't believe all that I've lost so far!

HCG is changing my life. My friend Ame, by introducing me to HCG and continuously answering my most inane and annoying questions, is changing my life. She, by the way, should be made the poster girl for HCG. I half joked that when she reached her goal weight we'll have her burst through a life sized photo of her previous self and post the video to youtube. But I'm thinking we'll figure out a way to do that for real. How empowering would that be?

The beautiful thing about HCG is that, if done properly, it works for everyone. Whether you have 20 pounds or 200 pounds to lose, it's going to work if you put in the effort. Follow protocol, stabilize (my next hurdle!) and live healthier, lather, rinse, repeat. I used to be one of those people that would kind of roll my eyes when people complained about their weight if they had less than 20 pounds to lose. I would have gladly traded places with them! But I know that often the less you have to lose the harder it is. Right now I'm averaging a 1.1o loss a day, but that might change the closer I get to my goal (still a long way off, folks). I will get there, I will continue and work hard on my end, and let the HCG do it's job. That's how I've managed not to cheat, knowing that if I just hang in there and resist temptation I'll be rewarded on the scale.

And in a strange way, Facebook and this blog keeps me honest. Knowing I have to post my weight firms up my willpower not to cheat. I have NEVER told anyone what I way, not willingly. One of the best things about getting my VA driver's license was not having to lie about my weight for once. I avoided weighing myself for so long that I honestly hadn't realized how big I'd gotten, and I've purposely avoided the scale most my life. If I don't know my weight than I can pretend. I self-delusionalized myself into obesity. But it's a new day and I'm taking control!